Where did this day come from?

Before I get started today, a quick word from my sponsor:

Today is brought to you by the Gregorian Calender- keeping things fresh and timely.

Now back to my program.

Yesterday, I completed a spec script I wrote for a fellowship program. It's for the show Entourage. If you're interested in reading it, I have posted it on the web. Click here if you want to read the script for Buzz. You can also leave comments and I appreciate any feedback!

Here is the warm-fuzzy for the day.


This not so cute, but hilarious nonetheless.


Everybody enjoy the extra day. Thanks Gregorian Calendar!!

The Man with a Thousand Faces

I have a unique dilemma. Once a week, a perfect stranger will approach me and say I look familiar (and I don't mean the guy at Barnes & Noble who is trying to recruit you into his pyramid scheme/cult of selling/worshiping baby food). So the next 10 minutes is filled with questions like:

• Where do you work? (Cyberspace)
  
• Are you on tv? (No)
• Did we go to high school together? (No)
• Are we in the same counseling group for people who can't seem to get over the fact that Buffy the Vampire Slayer was canceled? (Maybe)

After the informal Q&A, the person still insists they know me from somewhere. I assure them that I really don't and they eventually leave, shaking their head like a confused motorist on a one-way, dead-end street.

This experience always leaves me with the feeling that I just disappointed the person (now I know how my Father felt when I told him that I when I grew up I wanted to perfect the "jazz hands"). I would feel bad that I didn't live up to this person's expectations. Maybe if I tried a little harder in pre-school, I would be the guy that this random stranger knows. Then he would leave our encounter with a new zest for life and I would get a warm-fuzzy knowing that I gave a fellow human being hope! (cue John Williams score) Hope is all we need! A new hope (not a phantom menace)! Hope is the wellspring that nurtures the soul!

Hope!

I want a taco.


Congrats Diablo!!!

Hurray! It's Presidents Day

Today is one of those magical days of the year. Officially, the holiday is Washington's Birthday. Although, it's not even that (his birthday is really February 22), but we celebrate it on the 3rd Monday of February. Some states started observing Lincoln's birthday (February 12) on this day as well to save money on cake and presents.

Now most states just call today Presidents Day and honor both Washington and Lincoln. But why stop there. Why don't we celebrate all the men fortunate enough to garner more electoral college votes than their rivals? Actually, why should we limit it to government. Let's pay homage to the presidents of free enterprise like General Electric or Snapple.

Regardless of which president you choose to honor today, just remember the true meaning of the holiday.

Blowout prices at Mattress King!

Shaq Terrified Of Phoenix Suns After Reading About Supernovas

TEMPE, AZ—Claiming he was initially excited at the prospect of playing for a legitimate championship contender, new Phoenix Suns center Shaquille O'Neal admitted Monday that, upon reading about the phenomenon of massive stellar explosions...

Happy Trails!!

Don't you love it when you take a deuce and the poop wipes itself on the way out? No need to squeeze the Charmin! It pretty much sets the tone for my day! I hate the lower consistency turds. You can use half a forest worth of tp and there will still be residue. I know I can look forward to some quality chafing (where's the talcum?). Not to mention the fact, I'll be walking like a cowboy fresh off the Chisolm Trail.

I'm f*cking Sarah Silverman!!

Two weeks!!!

That's how long it's been since my last post. I don't have any excuse for the hiatus. It wasn't strike related. I would love to proclaim it was because James Cameron got a hold of my script and I've been on the phone non-stop with his suits hammering out a multi-million contract. Nope. Sorry, I've just had the blog flu.

But I'm feeling better now. Hydrating and all that. Still don't have anything fascinating to post. Hey, it's February! It's a Leap year too. So, we get that extra day. That Gregorian calendar is a marvel!

Okay, I've got nothing. I'm out.

Before I go. Some Sarah Silverman hilarity.




Little known fact: Sarah Silverman is f*cking me.