Today I was eating lunch at the Golden Arches. It consisted of the following:
- Grilled Chicken Snack Wrap with Chipotle BBQ and no cheese.
- Snack size yogurt parfait.
- Small diet beverage.
As I'm stuffing yogurt parfait into my cake hole, this elderly couple sit at a table across from me. The woman is delightfully debilitated maneuvering the aisles with her cane while the gentleman is giving her directions like a geriatric GPS. The couple sit down and start to spread out their meal before them. Cookies, drinks, and a sandwich. None of it from McDonald's. It was rather enchanting watching the couple eat. The sandwich was split evenly and shared. The cookies were consumed in between delicate swallows of their beverage. Even the gentle shaking of their incredibly aged bodies was mesmerizing. I had only one thought.
Please don't let me become an old couple. Or even just old. The moment I sit in a McDonald's and reminisce about the days when I didn't shit in a bag attached to my hip while sipping senior coffee is the day I start my Into the Wild vacation. Minus all the hitchhiking and getting beat up by train engineers. Just the eating poisonous plants and dying in a magic bus.
"In the wild, there is no health care. In the wild, health care is, 'Ow, I hurt my leg. I can't run. A lion eats me. I'm dead.' Well, I'm not dead. I'm the lion. You're dead." -Dwight Schrute.
No comments:
Post a Comment